Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Getting Old is a Bitch

I'm observing the poor dog that we're doggy-sitting at the moment. He's 16  years old, and currently has vertigo - that crazy syndrome where you lose your internal sense of gravity. It's like you've walked off that twirly ride at the fair and the world won't stop spinning.

Taking care of the ol' man/dog is forcing me to reflect more on my own ageing. I know, I know, I'm only 31 and in the eyes of many of my friends, "a spring chicken." But 31 is still 31, and time marches on incessantly while I scramble to pick up toys, clean paint off the wall, and stare blurry-eyed at my credit card bill.

What was your favourite age? Mine was 14 - it was a time where I had past the awkward pre-teen years, but still hadn't reached the annoying "I know everything" young adult years. I was still innocent in the ways of the world, had my future stretched out before me, and finally felt like I could just be me.

I am now me, but a whole different me, with a whole lot of expectations. And instead of seeing life stretched out before me, I see a lot of roadblocks and potholes.

We're supposed to get wiser as we age; perhaps gain more insight and calm down a little bit.

But with mortgages, babies, toddlers, jobs, and god knows what else, don't we just become more insane as the years go by? Strip away all these things we have collected and restrictions we have imposed on ourselves, and what are we left with?

A very existential conversation, I know, but an imperative one.

Because, really, I think I'd rather be the calm, wise gal than the cranky bitch who walks through the world as though she just stepped off the twirly ride. Any thoughts from the wise of the world on how to get there?

3 comments:

  1. I must say my favorite age was 21, I had an apartment that I was proud of. Owned everything in it, had a 500$ limit credit card. Worked full time waitressing, lived off my tips. Partied on the weekend (my days off were Sunday and Monday) I had everything I thought I wanted. I was care free. I loved it. Then a year later I watched two best friends (they were younger than me) go off to college while my feet ached after a buzy day of slinging grease. All I remember thinking was "What am i gonna do when I'm 40 or 65?" Six months or so later I moved to Ottawa and started college, had a baby, got a government job in my field, got married, bought a house, had another baby, quit my job, started taking care of other peoples babies. Am I any wiser for all that? Maybe. When you can dance to Mary had a little lamb instead of the latest from (insert hip hop singer) and really enjoy it yeah maybe I am wiser for seeing the simpler things that bring joy to a child and myself. Where do I see myself at 40 or 65? possibly working in some sort of health care related field (PSW) but for now I'll stick with partying like I'm four years old.....

    Sorry it's so long
    Shelly

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  2. I've adamantly decided to make my 40s my best years. That would mean that this right here - 41 - is my favourite age to date. I always heard that as we age as women we become more confidant and worry less about what people think. I find I still care far too deeply about whether I"m doing the 'right' thing and attributed this to worrying far too much what OTHERS NEED instead of my own needs. Thing is - how can you be a parent (or farmer) and not care for what other things need? Impossible! So I think the trick is to hold your elbows out - way out - like this, see? - and carve out time to notice who you are, what you need, what you like, what would help stop wanting to throw dinosaurs across the room, for example :) I haven't found it yet. But my forties are going to be my favourite. I refuse to have it any other way.

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  3. I'm with Julie! I am trying very hard to live in the present, and to find the good and light in every day. Although, I admit if I could keep the knowledge and experience from 41, and get my 17 year old body and metabolism back it would be the perfect combination :)

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