Tuesday, May 22, 2012

When you marry a golfer...

I met my husband at university - a time when we were both figuring out what to do with our lives. Exploring. Learning. Growing.

I wanted to get my PhD, and then teach at a well-respected university. I am now a doula, and I work in a hospital.

Hubby knew he wanted to work in golf - no, not playing golf. Actually working in the golf industry. And he had already worked for several years each summer at a local golf course back home. He is now an assistant manager at a very nice golf course.

I thought this was great. After all, I had a handsome boyfriend who could play a wicked round of golf. This would mean weekends on the green. Golf vacations in all parts of the world.

Too bad I couldn't play golf.

But in all seriousness, I admired him for knowing exactly what he wanted to do with his life. He was passionate about something, and was able to make a living from it.

The first place he whisked me off to was good 'ol Hunstville, Ontario. Home of Deerhurst Resort, and one of the best golf courses in the province. He had a blast! Met lots of great people, worked all day in the sun, and played all the free golf he wanted.

But I slowly began to realize that having a partner working in golf (and not just playing it) had some drawbacks:

1) People who golf are crazy. They get up at ungodly hours, just to see whether they can be the first jackass out on the green. This means very early hours, and an alarm clock that wakes up poor Misty as well.

2) People who golf are crazy. They golf until the sun has gone down (and if they're drunk enough, after the sun has gone down). This means Misty is without a partner in the evenings as well.

3) People who golf are crazy (do I hear an echo in the room?) I will be very stereotypical here, but there are 2 types of golfers - the young guys, and the old guys. The young ones tend to be very full of themselves. They drink a lot, and say stupid things. The old ones tend to be very full of themselves. They drink a lot, and say stupid things.
[My heartfelt apologies to all the women golfers...I know you're out there, and you kick ass. But unfortunately the industry is slow to change. It's still mainly about the "boys" and their "toys." Oh, and my apologies if you are a golfer and you do not drink and say stupid things. Thank you.]

I could handle all these things as a young, single gal. I just brushed off the rude behaviour from the men, and since we had no children, no mortgage, and basically no responsibility, it didn't bother me much that Tom was gone all day long.

But enter children. And mortgages. And house repairs. And my own life - with all of its crazy on-call schedule and frequent evening appointments.

All of this gives you the perfect recipe for a grumpy woman - from May to October, that is. With the first light dusting of snow, I breathe a sigh of relief. Finally, my partner in crime is back!

So as I posted on my Facebook page earlier, I want to publicly apologize to all people who come into contact with me over the next several months. Not only am I pregnant and grumpy, but I'm also unreliable. Any plans we make are dictated by tee times and weather patterns!

Disclaimer: my husband is awesome. He works really hard, and I know he enjoys his job. It might sound like I hate golf, but I really don't. In fact, I love it so much, I'm offering to let a golf Pro teach me how to play....for free! And no, my husband cannot teach me. We already tried that. The divorce papers were written up. Luckily, they were later destroyed.


  1. You forgot one - Golfers are Crazy - it's a bloody expensive sport!!! The equpiment, the clothing, the actual rounds of golf. Mind blowing how much money goes into the sport!

    I tried golfing once, my patience is not nearly high enough for something like that. Nor do I like the early mornings you mentioned :)

    1. So true!! Lotsa money needed, which is why it's still very "elitist" (did I spell that right?)


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